Wednesday, 24 June 2015

Dear Property Management, This is your life. Yours truly, Stock Photos

I read an article from the other day about what the industry looks like, according to stock photos. They depicted “real estate”, so I thought I’d do “property management”. 
If you came down in the last shower (which, if you live in Brisbane, was just the other day), and someone asked you what “property management” was... well, you’d search Google to know what they were talking about, right?
This is what you’d learn....
Houses are made out of American money, and they are small enough to fit in the palm of your hands. 
I could seriously list another 43,765 shots of houses in hands – but I’m sure you’re picking up what I’m putting down here (pardon the pun). 
You would also learn that houses live inside fish bowls. And they are, in fact, very petite. Perception at its best.

Yes, that’s right, your house is light enough for two people to pick up and carry away.  

You’d be thinking by now, you were pretty educated on what property management actually means. It means really small houses made out of money, light enough for two people to pick up and carry away. It also means red houses with about 8mm distance between you and your neighbour. 
Oh, and these professional looking people – who I’m assuming are the people who are selling the houses – are all surprisingly attractive. Like, ALL of them.  

And finally, once you’ve moved into your new really small, paper money house, you will start to unpack your belongings. It just so happens that every box you use is perfectly shaped without any removal blemishes (must’ve had a good removalist). And then, after a long day unpacking, you and your friend will draw smiley faces on the boxes and wear them on your heads. Because that’s just what you’d do, right?

I think the best photo of them all, and that really depicts “property management” at Rent Central... Is this:

That is, a professional looking manager who serves your gleaming investment (home) on a platter. Ah huh – you like that?!  Corny I know, but I couldn’t resist... after all, that’s what came up in the search.
So, what does property management look like to you? We’d love to see what your “property management” is. 

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